Wandering The Rabbit Hole

Finding the little joys in life can be hard. The large joys are impressive and can be easy to find. They are the ones that blow your mind. Make you so happy and are like Christmas morning. The best date, a wonderful gift,  weekend get away, a job promotion. These are the large joys. The little joys are those you experience on a day to day basis.  A smile from a stranger to brighten your sad day. A small note from your loved one just saying they are thinking of you. Sunshine rays peaking through a small break in the cloudy sky.  The feeling of the breeze on your face as you stand outside soaking in the sun. Letting your hand ride the waves of the wind as you drive with the windows down. A beautiful mussel shell found on a rainy day on the beach. It is these small bits of beauty in our life that make the little joys. They are the things that make the mundane doable. They are what keep us smiling and willing to continue in the pursuit of our dreams. T...

Ever feel that life just loves to screw you over? Or that it just has your number? Everything just goes wrong and you don't know what you did to deserve it? You treat people the way you want to be treated. You are kind, thoughtful, and patient. Thinking Karma has got your back. So what did you do to get tossed to the wind? Honestly, I don't know. Is it a test of character? How long will she hold before she cracks. Will she stand this gale we throw at her? Are you being tested for an even greater trial to come, or perhaps a test to see how well you work and operate under pressure? The outcome depends on the reward to come? I really don't know. This week, month and year have been that way. All I know is I have to continue being kind. Speaking words of kindness and compassion to those who thwart me. Face everything with a smile.Because if I let them wear me down I can not continue. I can not continue finding the little joys. I love Joy. So I will smile with eve...

Have you ever experienced those fears so deeply rooted in your soul? I face them everyday. I get up. Look in the mirror and wonder if I am enough. Will that wonder and fear ever go away? Am I enough for everything? Am I enough for my job? Will I walk through the door one day only to find that 'Pink-Slip'. To discover they found someone who does my job even better than me. Every time a promotion comes up or an opportunity to excel, I wonder, will I make it. Even if I do make it, there is the shock and immediate self-doubt. Will I be able to continue as well as I have? Am I enough? Am I enough for my friends? Will my fears and limitations stop me from being the best friend I can be? Will they embrace and accept the little I can offer? Give me space and I can be the best and loyal friend you could hope for, but is that enough? Am I enough for my children? I am broken, tired and worn thin. I wonder if I can give them the life they deserve. If a mother's love is enough to...

My name is Britta. I am a 27 year old homeschooled, divorcee and mother to three beautiful children. I am a historical costumer and an active participant in living history events in Southern California. I throughly enjoy drinking and learning everything there is to know about wine. Seriously. The wine industry is amazing. So it is only fitting I work at a small winery on the central coast. Art is a big part of my life. Whether that means I am designing a new costume or set of historical garments, sketching, writing poetry or painting. Also, Coffee is life Force. Without Coffee, life seems impossible. I have no filter without coffee.... So I say things straight from I don't even know where. So I can promise the snark is real, the feels are real and you may just say, "Britta said what!?" *Photography Credit Matty Johnson Photography https://www.facebook.com/mattyjohnsonphotography/